No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Girls - I think I have a problem with stealing random shit when I'm drunk.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
The air taste purple.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
