i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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