I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I just changed all my morning alarms to wake me up with different Jesse McCartney songs telling me I'm beautiful. Would you believe I'll be 25 this year?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
wow bdsm is so cute
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Randomize
