I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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