I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
