Do vagina's smell?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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