hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
Randomize
