Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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