I think I just saw someone hide a body.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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