I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
