this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I don't think brook has ever known best
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
