So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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