): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
