You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
noooo, I woke up on his pack porch and the SUN WAS RISING. I saw red lights everywhere and heard sirens so I just ran for my life.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
You called me into the kitchen so you could show me that you were peeing in the kitchen sink and then told me to leave bc you couldn't do it with me watching
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
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