I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize