Do vagina's smell?
She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
