Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
