He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
