I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Just got a call from someone claiming to be my son . How do I initiate a conversation. Tell me about the last eighteen years. And by the way who is your mom again?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES