Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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