why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
