Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
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