when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Randomize
