weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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