Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I'd like to request an "its my birthday discount", and for you to bartend shirtless tonight ;)
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
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