Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
that's an acceptable place to lick
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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