i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
"Why is there a bottle of Tequila taped to the fan?"
Randomize