Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
