If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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