I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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