How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Where is the hickey?
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
