if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
