So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
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