perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
