DAMN! I hate it when i drunkenly erase all my "sent message" and wake up in the morning and my inbox is full of "WTF?" and "Huh?" messages.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
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I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
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The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
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