he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
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