i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
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