As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Randomize
