I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I need a beard to bite.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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