I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
So squirting runs in the family.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
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