Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
He asked if I was a pirate because my "arrrrrrrrse" was worth burying. 10/10 for effort, 20/10 for serial killer vibes.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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