The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
