just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize