I just cut my nipple shaving
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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