I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
Oh my god. I think I just sexted my mom...
What?!
Fwd: Ride me, you sleek sleek woman!!!
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
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