i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
it's like heaven, but drunker
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
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