You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
it's like iHOP with fire
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
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