Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
So tomorrow I have my performance review with my boss who I banged. When I go in should I ask if this review will be rating my sex or work performance?
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
