Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(912): View more from Georgia

So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.

(1-912): View more from Georgia

Who leaves their car unlocked at night?

(912): View more from Georgia

Someone who wants to read the newspaper.

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(912): So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper. (1-912): Who leaves their car unlocked at night? (912): Someone who wants to read the newspaper. http://tfl.nu/c19o

Replies (23) Good night (7213) Bad night (855)
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(510): View more from California

I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.

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(510): I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself. http://tfl.nu/0jlx

Replies (74) Good night (1105) Bad night (3330)
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(518): View more from New York

He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"

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(518): He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!" http://tfl.nu/furw

Replies (68) Good night (7613) Bad night (2210)
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(541): View more from Oregon

Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.

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(541): Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening. http://tfl.nu/zy8e

Replies (26) Good night (1395) Bad night (8264)
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(763): View more from Minnesota

how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?

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(763): how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea? http://tfl.nu/6syz

Replies (12) Good night (2835) Bad night (987)
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(740): View more from Ohio

Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday

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(740): Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday http://tfl.nu/hztn

Replies (5) Good night (1849) Bad night (746)
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(250): View more from British Columbia

I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.

(250): View more from British Columbia

A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.

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(250): I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not. (250): A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop. http://tfl.nu/aiao

Replies (13) Good night (1431) Bad night (846)
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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face

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(603): Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face http://tfl.nu/t1ea

Replies (19) Good night (1672) Bad night (627)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.

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(+44): I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring. http://tfl.nu/y78v

Replies (8) Good night (721) Bad night (1422)
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(908): View more from New Jersey

he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward

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(908): he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward http://tfl.nu/i7kv

Replies (4) Good night (1577) Bad night (758)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.

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(405): I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream. http://tfl.nu/lzqh

Replies (12) Good night (2105) Bad night (536)
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(816): View more from Missouri

Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7

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(816): Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7 http://tfl.nu/lqxi

Replies (4) Good night (1157) Bad night (426)
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(703): View more from Virginia

I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car

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(703): I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car http://tfl.nu/t9eq

Replies (1) Good night (834) Bad night (481)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'

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(508): oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future' http://tfl.nu/w2au

Replies (8) Good night (713) Bad night (380)
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(925): View more from California

Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.

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(925): Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me. http://tfl.nu/oz9r

Replies (2) Good night (144) Bad night (453)

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