ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
