he shaved USA in his pubs
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Randomize
