clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize
